Romance=decadence?

I'm beginning to wonder, as I consider my sensible persona, whether romance and decadence are intrinsically linked.

The other night, I watched (for the zillionth time- damn you E4 and your stranglehold on our leisure time!) the episode of Friends where Monica and Chandler get engaged. The first time I saw this I cried; this time I was considering the awesome risk assessment that must have been undertaken in order to place all those candles around the world's most famous set.

My single mother's house is currently full of bouquets of seemingly antihistamine-resistant flowers. Apart from the odd centerpiece lovingly swiped from his place of work, I can't remember the last time the Husband brought home a bunch of flowers. I think this is for 2 reasons: a) he is skint, and b) he can predict my utterly sensible response to such a romantic deed- "Are they Fairtrade?", "Were any pesticides used?", "Kenya! Imagine the mileage!", "You know what the feminists would say about this. These flowers look just like vaginas!", or simply, "Where are the antihistamines??!". And so on...

Of course, this is all unbelievable hypocrisy coming from someone who not only (owing to a very sensible budget) bought her bridal bouquet online, but who would also secretly be delighted to receive a massive bunch of flowers.

Maybe I should make the first move. Feminists, help me. Where can I buy penis-shaped flowers?